Bad news. Frank and I have to stay here longer than expected.
We were planning to be done here in April of next year, move to the states and officially start the adoption. Things have changed. I have the option of going to Miami to study for my boards and begin pre-clinical rotations or to stay here. Because Frank has given up so much for me to go to medical school, I always bring these type of decisions to him. His choice was to stay here instead of moving. Financially this makes sense for us - he can keep his job longer which pays him well and is tax free. This also means we won’t have to pay to relocate to Miami temporarily and then to another city shortly thereafter. For him it is also a better choice because he won’t have to switch jobs again and again. A stressful thing to deal with on his part. We are settled in here and we know the area, too. I was hoping he’d say, “let’s go to Miami” - because all the points lead towards me staying here from my perspective, too. The program to review for my boards has higher pass rates here than in Miami and the hospital is known for great exposure. In Miami, students have had problems because they don’t speak spanish. For these reasons, we’ve decided to stay here longer. It’s the right thing to do, but it’s still bad news.
Why is this bad news if all those reasons seem positive? My Mom would say because we have to live far away longer, but for me it’s bad for a more important reason. Because it puts off our adoption. I am sad about this. I actually broke down and cried. I so look forward to the day we move back and put in that paperwork and I thought it was less than a year away. Now, we will not be able to officially begin until January of 2009. That is SO far away!!! It’s strange because I always say I am thankful we chose to adopt and not try all the infertility treatments…. thankful to not have to go through that emotional rollercoaster. Yet, here I am - waiting and waiting. In a way, I feel like I’m going through my own kind of treatments. I’ll get over it. I have to. I chose to be here and go to medical school. That is my dream. But, I dream of a family, too. So, I hope I don’t lose my readers and bloggy friends over this. Stick around. I promise I’ll still be discussing adoption and baby things on a regular basis. It will just be awhile before I’m whining about the real wait or ecstatic about a referral.
On a positive note…. Frank and I have a secret. I will share it with you all in the next few weeks. For now, here is a hint.
Sorry you have to put the adoption off a little bit longer. But once you move and are able to start you’ll have all of this behind you, right?
I’ll be cheering you on as you go and submit your paperwork to officially start.
I’m intrigued by your secret. Hope you can reveal soon.
Comment by Debbie — July 29, 2007 @ 10:41 pm
Hi Christen - don’t worry about losing us, we will be right here unless the Internet goes away and I don’t see that happening! Do what you need to do for now so your life will be ready for your little one when the time comes.
As for this secret…hmm…
Comment by Dede — July 29, 2007 @ 11:59 pm
Oooh, sounds like an exotic trip is in order. that’s my guess.
Sorry about your added wait time. It seems frustrating now, but the time will go quickly. What better way to pass the time than in the tropics! Perhaps when you are finally ready, all of these kinks with Russian adoption will be all worked out and everything will happen quickly for you from that point on.
Plus, you’ll have all this time to build your readership, and lots of cheerleaders for you when it FINALLY happens.
Comment by rachael — July 30, 2007 @ 2:32 am
You will be surprised at how quickly the time will fly.
Just keep writing. We’ll keep reading
Comment by elle — July 30, 2007 @ 3:26 am
Oh sweetie, I’m so sorry. I know how disappointed you must be. But you have to do what is right for your family and it sounds as if you both know (in your heads) that this is the right thing to do. Besides, I’m sure time will absolutely fly. I’ll still be following your blog - you can’t get rid of me that easily:)
And who knows, maybe if I can talk Stu into #4, we will be on our journeys together!
As for your secret, I’m thinking maybe a trip somewhere?!?!
Comment by Allison — July 31, 2007 @ 1:16 am
I’m sorry to hear you won’t get to move closer to family and back to the states sooner. That is hard.
As far as the secret goes… what a cliffhanger!!! DO tell.
Comment by brandie — July 31, 2007 @ 8:20 pm
It sounds like a long time away, but it will be here before you know it. Take it from me…I’ve been reading blogs since the Fall 2005 and starting blogging in Jan 2006. We didn’t start our paperwork until Sept 2006 and look at us now (still waiting). Hmmm, this wasn’t meant to sound depressing just that time does fly. Plus you’ll be finished with med school and a doctor! That’s awesome. You’ve got plenty of time.
Plus, that gives us more time to come visit you in Grand Cayman!
Comment by Tricia — August 1, 2007 @ 3:58 am
I’m sorry to hear this. Hopefully time flies for you and 2009 will be here before you know it. I’m here any time you need to vent.
Hugs!
Comment by Marie — August 1, 2007 @ 12:48 pm
I’m sorry you’re have to wait before you can start following your dream of a family, but I’m sure you’re making a wise decision. It stinks though. Why is it so hard to do what is right?
Comment by Tami — August 10, 2007 @ 12:44 am